You wake up one day and you feel the need for a drastic change. You know the feeling. Personally I get about 6 a month. you act on it, then go back to your old ways. the safety of repetition. The solace in mediocrity. Chance taking is for the fool on the hill, the wasteful, the tardy, the young and the precocious. Not for the middle-aged, mortgage laden older dad type. Or is it. I dont know, im really just not ok with my lot in life. Not that I want to be rich or be part of another family or anything. I just dont feel it at the moment. I dont feel that I am etching my mark in a way that makes me feel, I dont know, impervious maybe. I want to be as unaffected by brexit, by the rise of right-wing politics, by bigotry, by the instagram snapchat generation, by the xfactor, by autotune, by the oscars, by the selfie obsessed me me me lot, by the inability to be semi decent to a stranger, by those that put their image before substance, by the greedy, by the slovenly. By all of that bullshit and plenty more, you dont even know. I want to be free. I want to be as free as a human can be in a world that views friendship as a cumulative calculation at the side of a page on some global mass market social media machine. I want that, yes goddam it, I think I will start to strive for it. Me, my family and those that count and can be counted upon off we go. I’m sure I seen a motel beyond that last hill.
That is all.