Stay faraway but so close. Sometimes the urge to disassociate yourself from the rest of mankind is so great that it feels like ones ultimate goal. The urge to detach yourself from the very fibre of conceited existence. To break away and spin aimlessly into the void of nature or toward a wildscape further from anything that is manmade or given.
Though I suppose, its then that good old reality hits. The realisation that this is your head and not the shared collective heads of those you care about. In other words what we may think we want as individuals and may very well make complete sense to us, but ultimately may be the exact opposite to others. Some days sure, I would love to flee this rat race for lack of a better word and head off into some unknown horizon fully romanticised in my own head searching and such for the core of mother earth or some other nonsense. But, is that being a chicken shit and running from the world like I currently play or have never played any small part in contributing to it or at least some sort of corner of it to benefit myself or effect positively those that may intersect in it from time to time. Should staying put with a view to yielding some positive change to allow my own personal growth a second or third, maybe fourth or even a fifth chance to bloom and spread fevereshly or sluggishly through all those that I meet and happen to coexist with. Do you know what, I really dont know and each and every day bears such a startling resemblence to the last that it is frightening the banality of it all, and that can push me to leave my own head in search for isolation and I really dont know how to put it, just maybe in search of something else.